The Global Monthly Update for November 2017

Multiple helpings of Eastern action, French sci-fi, German horror, South American-themed Disney, a double-dose of Batman and, appropriately, a 3D trio all feature in my viewing for the penultimate month of 2017.


#152 Candyman (1992)
#153 Batman vs. Two-Face (2017)
#154 Awakenings (1990)
#155 Rurouni Kenshin 3: The Legend Ends (2014), aka Rurōni Kenshin: Densetsu no Saigo-hen
#156 Passengers 3D (2016)
#157 Justice League (2017)
#158 The Great Wall 3D (2016)
#159 Zatoichi the Fugitive (1963), aka Zatôichi kyôjô-tabi
#160 Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets 3D (2017)
#161 Saludos Amigos (1942)
#162 Tea for Two (1950)
#163 The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari (1920), aka Das Cabinet des Dr. Caligari
The Great Wall

Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets

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  • 12 new films this month mean that November isn’t 2017’s worst (a dishonour retained by September’s 10), but it’s far from its best (it’s 9th out of 11).
  • That’s below the 2017 average (previously 15.1, now 14.8) and the rolling average for the last 12 months (previously 14.58, now 14.42). Oh well.
  • On the bright side, it beats my November average, in the process raising it from 8.44 to 8.8. That means it’s still one of three months with an all-time average below 10, but if I watch 11 films in November 2018 then that’ll change.
  • Also, further to what I was saying in July about dates on which I’ve never watched a film, November 4th is now also struck off the list. Hurrah!
  • Zatoichi the Fugitive is my second Zatoichi film this year. That means that since I started watching the 25-film series in 2013 I’ve averaged… 0.8 films a year. Oh dear. If I maintain that rate I won’t finish until 2044.
  • This month’s Blindspot film: supposedly the first true horror film and the most famous example of German expressionism, The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari. While it’s very atmospheric, I don’t think it entirely holds up.
  • No WDYMYHS film this month. There’s only one left though, so next month it is.



The 30th Monthly Arbitrary Awards

Favourite Film of the Month
This month wasn’t an all-timer for quality — while I did enjoy most of the films I watched, very little jumps forward as a solid gold favourite. It comes down to a toss-up between two 2017 releases that each met with critical indifference but which I was pleasantly surprised to enjoy very much, especially with 3D really showing off their spectacle. On balance, I think the more interesting was Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets.

Least Favourite Film of the Month
In a mirror image to the above, there was nothing truly terrible. This category is considerably easier to decide on, though, because I was so thoroughly disappointed by Batman vs. Two-Face.

Most Underrated ’90s Film of the Month
Sure, not enough people talk about Awakenings (as I wrote in my review), but I was even more surprised to find that Candyman is a highly atmospheric horror movie that deserves to be better remembered.

Biggest Missed Obvious Solution of the Month
Considering they reshot almost all of his scenes anyway, they should’ve just had Superman be reborn with Henry Cavill’s silly moustache in Justice League. I mean, maybe it wouldn’t’ve been a good idea, but it’d’ve been a laugh.

The Audience Award for Most-Viewed New Post of the Month
For the fifth time this year, this award goes to the TV roundup. The headliner, and undoubtedly what attracted the most views, was Stranger Things 2. Also in the post was Peaky Blinders series three — another series that I know draws a lot of hits. It was further bolstered by covering Red Dwarf XII and an episode of Rick and Morty, plus Arrow, Bounty Hunters, Castle, Detectorists, The Flash, The Good Place, and Upstart Crow. (The highest new film review was Justice League at 9th.)



#41 Batman: Mask of the Phantasm (1993)
#42 Baby Driver (2017)
#43 Spider-Man: Homecoming 3D (2017)
#44 Men in Black (1997)
#45 Men in Black II (2002)

I hadn’t intended to embark on the Men in Black trilogy, particularly, but at a loss one night I settled on rewatching the first because why not? That led to the sequel, but not the third as yet. I’ve never seen it, so maybe next month.


I’ve written a list, I’m checking it twice — not of who’s been naughty or nice, but of films I intended to watch in 2017 and haven’t got round to yet. La La Land, Your Name, the new Beauty and the Beast… it goes on much longer than that. How many will I get through?

Plus: thirteen days to go ’til a galaxy far, far away…

Batman vs. Two-Face (2017)

2017 #153
Rick Morales | 72 mins | Blu-ray | 1.78:1 | USA / English | PG / PG

Batman vs. Two-Face

Last year the spirit of 1966 was revived when Adam West and Burt Ward returned to the roles of Batman and Robin (or their voices did, anyway) in Return of the Caped Crusaders, a fun comedy-adventure animation that paid tribute to the enduringly popular ’60s incarnation of the (not-so-)Dark Knight. Given the film’s success, it was no surprise a sequel was instantly in development. West completed work on it before his death earlier this year, meaning it now acts as a tribute. It’s unfortunate, then, that it’s not very good.

As the title makes clear, it sees West’s Batman come up against Two-Face — perhaps the most major member of Batman’s extensive Rogues Gallery to never appear in the TV show. Famed sci-fi author Harlan Ellison did actually write a treatment for a Two-Face episode, but the series was cancelled before it could be produced. It was adapted into a comic in 2015, and there was speculation it would form the basis for this animation too, but that isn’t the case. Maybe it should’ve been.

Things are weird from the off. The film begins by depicting a version of Two-Face’s origin — one that involves Harleen Quinzel, aka Harley Quinn, a character who wasn’t created until 25 years after the series this is based on. Anyway, it still sees DA Harvey Dent getting half his body fried and subsequently turning into a supervillain whose every decision is ruled by the flip of a coin. With this established in the pre-titles, there’s then a title sequence that shows plenty of Batman vs. Two-Face adventures. Is this a preview of what’s to come? No, because post-titles the story resumes with Harvey being cured. What a weird idea for a ‘first’ Two-Face story.

Why you two-faced...

Then Batman has to take on a variety of other foes, and you begin to wonder why the hell this is called Batman vs. Two-Face if he’s fighting everyone but Two-Face. Perhaps unsurprisingly, it does come back around to the eponymous enemy, though Batman refuses to believe his involvement — Harvey has been cured, so is someone impersonating Two-Face? The Boy Wonder isn’t convinced, but Batman is determined to believe his old chum. Oh yes, that’s right — this guy who’s just turned up in the series is apparently Bruce Wayne’s oldest bestest buddy. No wonder Dick’s nose is out of joint.

At the core of this, once what’s going on is eventually unravelled, is a not-half-bad Two-Face story. Unfortunately, that’s not really a strong marriage for this version of Batman — we don’t want a serious Bat-adventure, we want something light, daft, and above all fun. Batman vs. Two-Face isn’t exactly a sombre affair, but it isn’t funny enough either, lacking the gadabout charm of Return of the Caped Crusaders. The tone is just wrong. The makers admit they were trying to mix “camp with noir”, but — as I think any of us could’ve told them — that’s an unnatural combination that just doesn’t work. None of this is helped by the fact the animation looks cheap, even by the standards of DC’s other direct-to-video movies.

Best buds, supposedly

Clint Eastwood was being lined up to take on the role of Two-Face back in the ’60s, but he’s a bit above this kind of fare nowadays. Instead, the villain is voiced by another megastar of ’60s genre TV: William Shatner. Known for his mannered, scenery-chewing acting and ability to send himself up, Shatner seems the perfect foil for West’s Batman. Sadly, the material doesn’t allow Shatner to ham it up like you expect him to. Two-Face’s side of the story is played pretty straight, allowing none of the excess you’d expect from Shatner in comedy mode. Instead, the erstwhile starship captain delivers a genuinely decent acting performance. His voice work creates a clear delineation between the characters of Harvey Dent and Two-Face, and he delivers a fine interpretation of a man held hostage by his own alter ego. But, again, such a straight portrayal is not what’s desired from a Batman ’66 movie.

I was surprised to discover that Batman vs. Two-Face comes from the exact same writers and director as Return of the Caped Crusaders. The previous film nailed what it needed to be so perfectly, yet this seems to miss the mark almost entirely. My score errs on the side of harshness — there is fun to be had here — but it reflects my feeling immediately after the credits rolled that, overall, this was a massive disappointment.

2 out of 5